Many people commit suicide at the Red Pill stage, and if not, they do so here. Some people have weak constitutions and when they come about cold, hard, and unforgiving truths. . .they don’t handle it well.
I’ll use my grandfather as an example again, my aunt’s death broke him like nothing else. I watched him nearly fall to his knees with grief and two of his daughters had to hold him up. His pain was so palpable I even shed a tear. Then a couple months later my grandmother divorced him after fifty years of being together and forty-eight years of marriage.
Over the months, the family started distancing themselves from him. I moved to California, and he was described as being a ball of negativity. During that time he got cancer (the same thing that took my aunt) and he was in and out of the hospital. it got to the point he needed a cane to walk. I didn’t get to see him over the months, more like I didn’t go see him because I wasn’t going to watch him die in a hospital. Not in the sense of being afraid of going through pain but from my understanding that his death was coming and it was just a matter of time.
He died on October 19, 2019. And he will be missed.
Now, I say all this to show the unrelenting darkness of the Black Pill. He was seventy-five years old, way to old to go through something like this and come out strong. At the end of his life, his whole world crumbled and everything was snatched away form him with no mercy. Although he still had five other daughters and people who loved him, the pain of outliving your child is one no parent should have to go through, especially if they love their children deeply.
He was a deeply knowledgeable man in terms of religion. Islam. My grandfather was a devout Muslim for forty years, reading the Holy Quran every night at 3 a.m. and partaking in Ramadan every year. So, in a sense, you can say he was “Red Pill”.
As unfortunate as his plunge into darkness was, as the plunge is death either physically, emotionally, spiritually, or psychologically, it was a necessary plunge. The point of going through the Black Pill to understand the deep and existential nature of existence and sometimes we have to die to do so. Now, reincarnation, past lives and all that other stuff and come into play here but those things are debatable.
In terms of writing, this would be prolonged writer’s block or deep depression or simply considering giving up on writing and finding something else. I mean, writers are a pretty depressing and kooky group of people anyway.
The Black Pill is simply an over-consumption of the Red Pill, some people can handle it and others cannot. Some live to tell the tale and others don’t. To go through the Black Pill means to go through immense suffering and pain. To experience the absence of hope ans a sense of self. To experience death in its conventional nature or while you are still alive.
Alright, that’s my spiel. Til next week. . .